Category: Random Shitpost

What Midjourney thinks a ToasterBotnet would look like

I just shot an entire video in one cut,
transferred it to my workstation,
loaded it into cinelerra
and noticed the external mic wasn’t selected.
The entire audio is bad.
Have to do it all over again.

It’s World Password Day.
To celebrate I offer the
Toaster Password Security Check.

You can send me all your passwords,
I’ll check them and tell you if they are secure.
Free Service only available for a limited time.

First time bond buyer reporting in.
Bought Treasury Bonds today.
Am I a boomer now ?

SEE YOU NEXT YEAR ! 🙂

KAUFSIGNAL ???

Remember, Remember the Fifth of November.
Hey it’s Gunpowder Plot Day.
What are you waiting for?
Blow up some authoritarian regime or something.

I’ve barely had any sustanance today. One Shake. One god damn shake.
If I’m not losing weight until tomorrow I’m suing Darwin.
This is unacceptable. Losing fat is way too hard.
I should start doing meth or something

Do you ever feel super stupid?
Like … you actually start to question everything
and think about how you might have a huge defiency
but nobody ever told you?
Sometimes I like to introspect and
think about myself and I often come to the same conclusion:
Thank god for the internet.

I learned so much online that I believe without internet access,
I probably would eat bananas with the skin.
I’m still a monkey with a keyboard
but If it weren’t for the abundance of free information
and courses on the tubez, I would be even be more of a dork.

It’s truly a great time to be alive.

What the fuck is going on with Stonks ?

I’m starting to go into the red. I’m not amused.
This is not what I signed up for.
The guys on Reddit told me Stonks only go up. Somebody help.

J Powell? Lagarde? What’s wrong? Are the printers stuck?
Maybe I can help I work in IT. Try turning them off and on again.

This almost feels like crypto. Make them damn stonks go up again.

/edit:
ah ! Not so bad after all.
Nintendo had a 10-for-1 Stocksplit and my App hasn’t caught up. phew !

Do you know that feeling when you just start to download random shit from the internet just to satisfy your urge to hoard data ? No particular aim. Just downloading for the sake of downloading. Like … you don’t even want to consume the stuff, you just want to hoard it….

You don’t ?

Well I might have to talk with my psychiatrist about that.
I might have a problem.

How do people manage multiple personal projects ?

I have like 2 or three and I barely get anything done.

It’s overwehlming. Can’t even enjoy my staycation.

Aaaaand Hellooo Backlog.

Can somebody turn off the fucking sun?

This shit is getting ridicoulus. I need an AC.

I’ve done my taxes in january. Which means I’m waiting since 6 months for my shit to get processed now. 6 fucking months. And today I wanted to log into elster online to check if I accidentally didn’t submit them or something. Now the website is broken and I can’t login. Some input field is missing or something. Checked with different browsers.

I love germany. That’s how we role.

Am I too harsh? Maybe I should be more patient and give them another 3 months for the website to get fixed and 3 months for my taxes to be processed. This should put the deadline to 2023. No pressure. Everybody chillax !

What AI thinks a ToasterBotnet looks like

Alright Alright Alright…. The almighty social media algorithms can stop suggesting me videos about the BASF stock now. I get it I get it. I give up. And I already bought in. Now shut up. Jesus I hope it doesn’t drop more.